Pigging Out

Bert Swinston, a man of many appetites. Weighting at an obese 359 pounds, he was large and in charge. Or rather, he was large and stuck in a barrage. Bert had no family, no friends, no job and lived in a meadow in beat up old trailer he bought from the junkyard. His parents were rich, and when they both passed away from cancer, he inherited some big cash. He didn't use it to buy a nice house, just the basic XXL clothes and furniture, oh yeah a big plasma TV. What he really spent his money on, was food. Bert only pounded the pavement to eat. He went from restaurant to restaurant to all-u-can-eat buffet to restaurant stuffing his giant face will all sorts of food. All of the money he received was spend on food. He's been banned from at least 7 buffets for hogging down all the food. It's a surprise he hasn't had a heart attack yet. He lived a content life, full of stuffing his face with food and sleeping until noon everyday. Not the healthiest life, but a content life.   

One day, Bert was getting his daily exercise, walking to a restaurant for lunch. He arrived at his usual Chinese buffet and was about to enter when he saw his picture of him eating lunch from last week on a piece of paper taped to the window that said "DO NOT ALLOW THIS MAN TO ENTER." He chucked and sighed at the same time. This wasn't the first time he was banned from a buffet. Especially, not just because he eats all the food, he eats in a way so revolting, it scares away customers. Bert slowly waddled away from the buffet in search for a place he could get some lunch.

Bert's legs were getting tired; he's never walked this much before in a while. He was about to pass out from hunger when he spotted a new sight; the Grand Re-Opening of a restaurant. Slowly he made his way to the lot. It was the Piggin' Out BBQ Grill, which had closed down several months ago due to controversy with the meat that they were serving. The banner said, "NEW OWNERSHIP, NEW FOOD, NEW RESTURANT." Bert had previously had stayed away from the Grill because the first time he went, he got major food poisoning. But, with his newest banishment and nowhere else to eat, he decided to give it another chance.   

Bert entered the restaurant. It was significantly different than from what he remembered. The entire inventory of beat up tables and chairs had been replaced, the walls had been repainted, and there was a wondrous smell coming from the dining room. The sign next to him said "All You Can Eat BBQ! Only $10!" Bert ran to the cashier counter; threw down a ten buck bill and ran into the dining room. In the center, was a GIANT display of every BBQ you could think of. Baby back ribs, beef burgers, steaks and pulled pork sandwiches. There were also private booths with curtains so you can eat in total privacy. Bert was speechless at the wonders that fell before him. He quickly grabbed a plate and loaded it with enough BBQ to feed a homeless shelter, and quickly made his way to a private booth, a pulled the curtain and started to eat. The food was amazing, better than any Chinese buffet he had ever been banned from. He was in BBQ heaven.

While Bert was busy stuffing his face as usual, he failed to notice the man in black watching him closely from the next booth.

For the next week, Bert visited the restaurant everyday for lunch, eating plate after plate after plate after plate of food. One day, he arrived at the restaurant, opened his wallet and found to his shock it was down to one 10 buck bill. Bert had kept all of his money he had inherited in his wallet, as he didn't trust banks. His only stash of cash was hidden under his bed, but that was only 50 dollars. He put the money on the counter, headed for the dining room and began filling his plate with food. Halfway though, he felt nature calling so he got up and headed for the restroom. He was about to enter the restroom when the man in black came up to him. "Hello, you're name is Bert am I correct?" Bert smiled, "Who wants to know?" "The owner of the joint would like to have a word with you," said the man in black. Bert frowned; of course this meant he was going to get kicked out again. He shrugged, forgetting he had to use the restroom, and followed the man in black.  

The two men walked to the back of the restaurant and into a small room with a chair and a couple of tables. "Please, have a seat," said the man in black and Bert sat down in one of the chairs. "The new owner would like to talk to you." The man in black exited and in walked a hefty man with a pinstripe suit and holding a cigar. Bert leaned back on the chair and out his legs up on the table, "So, you're going to kick me out huh, I don't care I'll just-," "That is not the reason I have asked for your presence Mr. Swinston," said the man. Bert leaned forward, "Oh yeah? Then what for?" The man smiled, "I'm surprised that you haven't asked for my name, you may call me Mr. Big, I am the new owner of this grill." "Just cut to the chase old man I still have half a plate of food waiting for me," said Bert. "Very well," said Mr. Big, "Let's cut to the chase. You have been quite the regular customer, and we have noticed you have quite the appetite." Bert patted his fat stomach, "It's what I take pride in." Mr. Big grinned, "You see Mr. Swinston we are looking for someone to be our mascot, someone who has a big appetite and appeal to our customers." "Not happening Big," said Bert, "Working isn't my thing." "Oh of course it means you will eat here for free the rest of your life." Bert thought about it for a second, "Fine, what are the requirements?" "I just need you to answer a few questions for me," said Mr. Big.

"Do you have any family?"
"No, died of cancer."

"Do you have friends?"
"Yeah, food."

"Do you own a house?"
"Nah, live in a small trailer."

"Do you have a job?"
"No, I said working isn't for me."

"Last one, if you disappeared off the face of the Earth would there be anyone who would notice?"
"Nobody, the Earth would just weigh less."

Mr. Big smiled, "Perfect! You got the job!" Bert smiled, "Awesome, what do I do?" "Oh nothing I just want you to try out this new pork burger we have just made," said Mr. Big with a grin. A man in black entered with the juiciest, mouth watering burger and set it in front of Bert. "Now if you'll excuse me I have to do something, I'll be back in five minutes," said Mr. Big and quickly exited the room and shut the door.

Bert quickly took the burger and crammed it into his mouth. It was amazing, every aspect of it. Bert dropped the burger when he felt a sudden surge run though his body. He looked at himself, he seemed normal. He went to pick up the burger again for the second time, when he saw his hands had changed into hooves. "What the heck?!" shouted Bert. Suddenly, he felt another surge and he felt like he was gaining weight. "What did those creeps do to me?!" He stood up, but his feet started to hurt. Frantically he kicked off his shoes and socks to see his feet had turned to hooves too. "I-I gotta get outta here!" shouted Bert as he ran for the door. He frantically tried to open the door, but it was locked. He started pounding on it. "LET ME OUT! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!" His nose began to feel funny. He felt his nose flatten and become a pig's nose. His ears also flattened out and curved. His hair began to recede. "NO! NO! NO-SQUEEEEEEEEEAAAA-!" Bert's voice shattered, and when he tried to talk again he only grunted. His skin turned pink and fine coarse hair grew all over his body.

Bert was almost a full pig, except for his clothes, a tuff of hair and he was still standing on two legs. He had lost the ability to speak and his voice came out in grunts. Suddenly he felt something from his rear. Slowly he turned his head to see a curly tail grow out. He felt himself gaining more weight and his butt started growing out of his pants, he was getting one major wedgie. He desperately tried to pull down his pants with his hooves, but eventually his weight tore them and his underwear and they fell to the floor. Suddenly he felt a jolt and his legs started to wobble. He squatted and put his front hooves on the floor, trying to remain upright. He then remembered he still had to use the restroom, and suddenly, without warning, he took a huge dump right on the floor in the middle of his torn pants. Bert looked down when he realized what he did and blushed with embarrassment. His body convulsed and he fell on his stomach. He tried standing up again but fell down again, when he eventually stood on all fours. The last of his hair receded into his head and Bert had become a pig.

Bert looked at his new body. His shirt was almost ripped, his pants and underwear were destroyed, and he had doubled in weight. He grunted and squealed uncontrollably. The businessmen entered the room with smug looks on their faces. Bert knew that they had done this to him. One of them ripped off the remains of his shirt and another one swept away his pants and his excrement. "Now you are ready to be our official mascot," said Mr. Big as he put a leash around Bert's neck.  

Bert was officially made the Pigging Out Grill's official mascot, Porker the Pig. It wasn't such a bad deal. He appeared in many commercials advertising the restaurant, and within days, more customers came to see and admirer the adorable Porker. Sure he had to get past the nudity and litter box, but overall Bert, err I mean Porkers, lived a content life, he was washed, pampered and fed scraps 4 times a day. It wasn't the healthiest life, but it was a content life.